One in five Kiwis keep financial secrets in relationships

Tāmaki Makaurau - Twenty two percent of Kiwi in relationships keep money secrets from their partner, with the most common secret hiding spending or purchases, according to the latest ASB bank survey.

A total of 83 percent of New Zealanders talk to their partner about money but only half are aware of their partner’s financial commitments. Men are around twice as likely to be in the strongest financial position in heterosexual relationships, the survey shows.

Two thirds are cutting back on non-essential spending due to higher living costs.

As rising costs put more financial strain on relationships, new ASB research has found many couples avoid crucial money conversations, with one in five Kiwi keeping financial secrets from their partner.

The ASB-Ipsos survey of 1000 New Zealanders in committed relationships revealed one in five keep secrets such as loans, investments, income or spending from their partner.

Middle aged men are the most likely to do so, with around a third of males aged 34 and 54 hiding aspects of their finances. Women were more likely to hide spending, while more men conceal income from their other half.

Around one third of those who have been through a divorce or prior financial breakup keep money secrets from their current partner compared with 19 percent of those who haven’t been through a financial split. 

Ahead of work, children and health, money was the leading cause of relationship stress among respondents. While 69 percent are talking with their partner at least weekly about finances, most stick to everyday topics such as spending, budgets and bills.

Three quarters of Kiwis don’t talk to their partner about investment, insurance, KiwiSaver or planning for retirement.

Sixty one percent of respondents admitted limited understanding of their partner’s overall financial situation.

A quarter didn’t know what their partner earns; around half were not aware of their partner’s financial commitments such as loan repayments and child support, and two in five said their partner wasn’t aware of their personal debts.

Eighty four percent of Kiwi say they have a shared financial goal with their partner and just over half share responsibility for their finances equally with their other half.

When asked about their income, assets and earning potential, 41 percent of men in heterosexual relationships said they were in the strongest financial position in their relationship compared with just 22 percent of women.

ASB’s Rosalyn Clarke says money is a loaded topic and their research found shame, fear and worry that their partner would think differently of them were key reasons Kiwi are not honest about money in their relationships.